Saturday, November 18, 2006

my last nywc for 2006

i'm in cincinnati at the national youth workers convention but this is the last one i'm attending this year. i'm not sure if i've enjoyed this year more because i'm back in ministry or at least more purposeful about ministry but whatever the reason i've devouring the information being presented.

2 weeks ago i heard shane claiborne for the first time and cried for 3 hours while i simply tried to unpack his message and life. shane lives and works at the simple way in north Philadelphia. he talked about what he learned from mother theresa, from the homeless, the poor, the broken, and the least. i realized for maybe the first time that there has to be more to life than all of this. yeah i've gotten mad at our society, our value, and so many other things i don't have time to write them but i've been a pacifist instead of an activist. so for the last 2 weeks i've been contemplating all that i've taken in and what does it mean for me now.

now here i've listened to donald miller last night and brenda salter mcneil today and both just blew me away. i've only heard donald a few times but it just seems like he gets life. he talked about how the church used to be in a cross and that today our society is in malls or entertainment facilities. don't get me wrong these work but i would question if something is lost when we lose that cross. i can't remember the last time that i set in a pew or picked up a hymnal. why? i guess i'm trying to say that i miss it.

and if donald's all to close to home message wasn't enough brenda set it off this morning with your talk about "who are you?" and who are our students. she made a comment that she purposed that the highest act of worship is to become who god says you are. wow. i can't express enough how many times i question who i am, so if brenda's theory is accurate then i'm doing exactly what saddens god and not worship him at all in those moments. but the thing that i resonated with the most is that when you are looking for god (i would add even looking for yourself) and don't see him then look again.