sometimes just being heard is enough

i met with denise vanek from mars hill today. i don't know what i expected but i knew from the first time that i met her that i liked her. i felt like i could trust her and that i would be safe.

for the last 2 years i've struggled with church. church as an institution, church as a building, and church as an unhappy place. last summer i even went so far as to leave the church (well i withdrew my membership) but i still went there and prayed that god would show me a church that would make me happy. in the year and a half since then no one from the church ever called, ever wrote, and possibly didn't even care. well that is what i thought at least until today.

i told denise my story, my concerns, and my questions. she didn't try to answer them but she did listen. she didn't offer any excuses but an apology. she gave me exactly what i needed. she gave me herself for the time that we were together. she gave me hope. she also gave me encouragement.

i can't assume that the questions are gone but the restlessness in my heart is somehow soothed.